We’re heading into the holiday season, and while some may not look forward to the hustle and bustle of the holidays, many acknowledge that family time has a way of giving us warm, fuzzy feelings. The end of the year can bring about some of the best moments. You may look forward to cooking with your loved ones, exchanging laughs at the dinner table after family meals, or having more intentional moments with your family. With everyone’s schedule being so busy, it can be challenging to set aside time to spend with family. In addition, it can also be easy to forget the importance of family time and impacts it can have on your family unit. In our ever-increasing world of demands, we often add more responsibilities that compete with family time. 

Parents spending time with their children is critical for building strong family ties, making lifelong memories and creating an environment that builds self-esteem and character in children. Family time creates warm memories for parents and children alike. Children with happy family memories are more likely to create a loving environment for their own children when they grow up. 

Family time can consist of several different activities that range from 5 minutes to all day fun. Need some new ideas on how to maximize your family time? Check out some of these ideas that take little to no time to implement. Although the quantity of time may be difficult, it’s the quality of time that matters. 

Here are a few positive benefits to spending quality time with family this holiday season.

Family time encourages healthy relationships- One of the most important reasons that family time is vital for children’s development is the effect it has on their relationships. If you want your children to be able to enjoy healthy connections with others, this is the perfect time to set the example. Try taking short walks, putting up decorations together, or having family meals once a week. Dinner is a perfect opportunity to spend some quality time with your loved ones.

Family time strengthens family bonds– Families who participate in activities together form strong emotional ties. Studies have shown that families who enjoy group activities together share a stronger emotional bond as well as an ability to adapt to difficult family situations. Experience life together. Do things as a family. Go for a hike, bike ride or make a pillow fort in the living room. Kids who participate in activities with their family have a higher sense of belonging and higher self-esteem.

Helps parents and children reconnect– Spending time together as a family helps busy parents to relax and reconnect with their children. Children tend to share more information about their lives while enjoying an activity with the parents rather than when you ask them “What did you do today?” Family activities should be a time where open communication takes place. Congratulate each other on accomplishments and encourage those who had a bad day. 

Parents get to embrace their inner child– Holiday celebrations with your family aren’t just about the adult activities, but spending and enjoying quality time with children. Their excitement and joy is infectious, and family holidays are the perfect time to let go and indulge in play time. Your kids will mimic your attitude and behavior. Have fun and focus on the present, which is spending time with your little one. They will remember these moments for a lifetime. 

Take some time this holiday season to enjoy these little moments with your family. Although quality time may look different this year, embrace the time you have. Hug your little ones a little tighter, laugh a little louder, and make the best of your upcoming holiday season.

Additional Resources:

10 Crafty Ways to Spend Quality Time with Your Family

7 Family Bonding Holiday Activities

Although we wrapped up National Preparedness Month in September, we are still in the thick of hurricane season. As we prepare for cooler weather, it’s important to ensure your family has a plan in place for emergencies. Natural disasters can strike at any moment. Recently in Southern California, wildfires have been threatening many families, as others are battling hurricane season along the East Coast and Gulf of Mexico. Although emergency planning isn’t fun to think about, it’s important to know which types of disasters could affect your area and how you will respond.

Here are some tips that could help prepare your family in case of an emergency.

Put a plan together by discussing questions with your family, friends or household to start your emergency plan. How will I receive emergency alerts and warnings? What is my shelter plan? What is my evacuation route? What is my family/household communication plan? Do I need to update my emergency preparedness kit?

Allow your children to be involved in planning. Be sure they are included in your emergency preparedness conversations. Do they know where to meet the family if you all are separated? You can even build an emergency kit with your child and make it into a game. Go through different locations with your child to find what you need for an emergency kit. Have fun and build a checklist along the way.

Fill out a family emergency plan. Make a written family emergency plan and clearly communicate it to all family members to ensure everyone is on the same page in the event of an emergency. Download this family emergency plan and see if it will work for your family.

Communicate with your child care provider. Because a disaster can strike during school or work hours, you need to know their emergency response plans and how to stay informed. Discuss these plans with children, and let them know who could pick them up in an emergency. How will the provider contact you in case of an emergency? What is their emergency preparedness plan? Make sure you are signed up for alerts, warnings, and other texts from your child’s school and child care provider.

Practice, practice, practice. Be sure your family knows the plan you all have agreed on. Practice this a few times a year so no one forgets, especially before disasters occur like hurricane season. After you practice, talk about how it went. What worked well? What can be improved? What information, if any, needs to be updated? If you make updates, remember to print new copies of the plan for everyone.

Sesame Street has created an Emergency Preparedness Guide for families and videos for child care providers. The Institute of Childhood Preparedness also offers online trainings for child care providers to help improve centers and their response in the case of an emergency. They suggest finding easy ways to help children remember this vital information like songs, jingles or rhymes. No matter the strategy you choose, repetition is key. It can help to practice in the car and at bedtime. This will help ensure your child will be positively identified in case of an emergency or separation.

Please take a moment to review this important information, discuss it with your family, and make plans accordingly. In times like these, it is beneficial to hope for the best but prepare for the worst.

Resources:

Sesame Street Emergency Preparedness ToolKit

Handling Emergencies

Family Emergency Communication Plan

Child Care Aware of America- Emergency Preparedness

Emergency Preparedness for Providers

A new school year is approaching and many parents and teachers have to take an unconventional approach to educate children. Over the past few weeks, return to school has been the main source of stress, anxiety, and frustration for many parents. The community was not fully prepared for the drastic shift. Parents may feel overwhelmed and unprepared to transfer their child’s classroom into the home without the right tools, resources, or years of training as a teacher. THAT’S OKAY! Distance learning is new, for parents, teachers, and most students alike. With everyone trying to figure out how to make this work, keep in mind that virtual learning doesn’t have to be scary, and can actually have rewarding benefits.

While we’re trying to find a balance between self-discipline and self-care, maintain patience and remember the few things you can do to make life run a little smoother in your child’s virtual classroom.

Connect with your child’s teachers. Teachers have been trying their best to be available and make
this new norm as smooth as possible. Stay in touch with them and ask questions. Remember you’re the student too in all of this. Work together.

Set a schedule/routine that works for you, but also keep it flexible. Not only may this look unlike their traditional school day, but it may include getting school work done on weekends when parents have more time to help out. Communicate with teachers about what your family is going through and get creative with how best to use your time.

Give yourself grace. You don’t have to be perfect. This is new for all of us. Every approach will be different. If yours is different from someone else’s, it’s okay. It is most important that your approach works for your family!

Be realistic in goal setting. Everyone has a different situation. Some parents at home and able to assist, some are essential staff working overtime, and some are able to work from home. Create weekly goals for your child that takes your family and circumstances into account.

Create a Community Pod. Have friends who are all dealing with the same unfamiliar virtual learning life? Schedule Zoom time with other families to give kids a chance to socialize, play, and chat with one another. This can be designated time throughout the day that they kids can look forward to while you catch up on work and return an email or two.

Just remember, you’re not alone. Remote learning has presented parents with many new challenges. Many families are still adapting and adjusting to new responsibilities, like teaching. However, circumstances have provided new opportunities to improve parental involvement and create new memories for your children in the future.

Additional Resources:

Virtual Learning Tips for Parents

For the First Time Homeschooling Parent/Teacher

Balancing Work and Homeschooling

Virginia is currently in Phase III of reopening. As the summer is quickly coming to an end, families are planning for the fall. Many parents have returned to work, physically or remotely, but must continue to focus on the health and safety of their children, as well as consider their development and socialization.

COVID-19 infections are continuing to spread. The decision to send your child back to care is entirely dependent on what’s best for your unqiue family situation. As you weigh your options and begin making the decision about returning your children to care, we’ve laid out a few things to consider.

Think about your family’s needs. Consider if you need full-time or part-time care. Is your work schedule flexible enough to allow you to cut back on hours in child care? Are you able to coordinate schedules with your spouse or loved ones?

Think about your family’s risk tolerance. What is the risk of serious illness to a member of our household if someone in your household were to be exposed to COVID-19? Are there children or family members with high-risk medical conditions such as diabetes, lung disease or heart problems? Do any older family members live with you? As we continue to take precautionary measures to limit the spread of the virus, both at home and in child care facilities, we also have to be mindful of the educational and social aspects of our child’s development. These are some factors to consider as you make your decision.

Questions to ask your child care provider:

Many parents are reliant on full-time work to provide for their family. In these cases, sending your child to child care or caregiver is necessary. To make you feel more comfortable, we encourage you to ask your provider questions about their reopening plan.

· How is the provider/center maintaining cleanliness and sanitation?

· How many children will be assigned to each provider?

· How are they maintaining social distancing?

· Will adults/parents be kept out of the facility as much as possible to limit exposure?

· Is there a plan in place for if a child or staff member tests positive for COVID-19?

This is a challenging and uncertain time for all. Regardless of your decision to resume child care services or not, we’re here to help in every way possible as we undergo this journey together. For a list of operating child care programs near you, give us a call at 1-866-KIDS TLC or visit our child care self-search at vachildcare.com.

Additional Resources:

Should I send my child back to childcare?

How can daycares prevent the spread of COVID-19?

Phase III Guidelines for Child Care Providers

Learn More about Contact Tracing

While summer is typically associated with learning loss, we challenge you to make this is summer full of fun opportunities to keep the gears turning during the summer break. School is out, but the learning continues!

The “summer slide” is a term that refers to a decline in reading ability and other academic skills that can occur over the summer months when school is not in session. This can create a delay during the first 2 months of school since teachers have to reteach previous information to help kids get back on track. It is important that we keep our children’s academic skills polished when school is out, so they return to school ready to build on their skills and knowledge instead of playing catch up. COVID-19 has changed how we go about our daily lives—especially when it comes to how our children learn. With widespread school closings, students and families are challenged to continue learning in a very different environment. However, parents and educators are still finding creative and innovative ways to help students stay on track.

Although we may not be able to travel as much this summer, we can still make the best of the time we have at home and make learning fun. Summer break provides the perfect environment to get outside, enjoy the fresh air, reconnect with your family and have fun in the comfort of your own home! Whether you’re prepping your little one to transition to the next grade level or just trying to find things to occupy their busy minds, these science experiments are easy, inexpensive and a lot of fun for kids of all ages. Who knows, you may end up learning something too!

Tornado in a bottle– With only a few simple supplies, you can create your own tornado in a bottle. Add glitter, food dye, or lamp oil to the bottle to make your weather lesson even more exciting!

Gooey slime– Your child will truly feel like a scientist with this experiment. Mix glue, water, food coloring, and borax, to create a gooey slime!

Rainbow in a cup– This experiment takes advantage of density to create a rainbow in a cup. An interesting science experiment using supplies you probably already have in your home!

Become nature experts during your next family walk. Check out the leaves from different trees around your neighborhood or even hunt for bugs!

Cooking is science too! Get your little one involved with preparing dinner. We’ve talked about the importance of family meal time and a balanced diet, but meal time also provides an opportunity for learning to take place.

Children are naturally curious and eager to discover the world. You can continue igniting their creative minds with hands-on science experiments that are sure to blow their young minds. These simple science experiments are parent, teacher, and kid approved for your future scientists.

Additional Resources:

23 Science Experiments to try at Home

Science Fun

Importance of Summer Learning

Summer Learning Resources for Parents

Each summer we see heartbreaking headlines about children being left unattended in hot vehicles.  According to Kids and Cars, over 940 children have died in hot cars nationwide since 1990, and in 2018 alone, a record 52 children died from heat-related deaths. These tragedies can happen to even the most loving, caring and responsible families.

Summer is just around the corner and the weather is warming up. Child Care Aware of Virginia encourages all caregivers to never leave a child in a vehicle unattended, look in the back seat every time you leave your car, always lock your car, and keep your keys out of children’s reach.

Parents are busy and we know you are juggling a lot. How many mornings have you left your house and in a forgetful moment, think “Did I close the garage? Did I turn off the coffee pot? Did I remember to lock the front door?”  How often has your usual morning routine been rerouted for one of a hundred different reasons?

These little changes in your routine may be the very things that can cause you to forget your precious cargo in the backseat.  Loving, responsible parents can be overwhelmed and forget to look in the backseat. With our children’s lives on the line, we can’t afford to be distracted during our daily routines. Here are a few basic tips to help you stay alert and establish a routine to keep children safe while in your vehicle.

• Establish a system to remind yourself that your child is in the car. Try placing a briefcase, purse, or cell phone next to the child’s car seat; that way you will always check the back seat before you leave your car. Order a BabyInBabyOut hangtag for your rear view mirror to remind you to #LookBeforeYouLock.
• Involve caregivers. Ask your child care provider to send you a text or give you a call if your child does not show up as planned.
• Set an alert on your phone. Create an alarm to sound each morning around the time you drop off your child or would be settling into work. When the alarm sounds, go through a mental checklist to be sure your child is safe.
• Don’t allow access to the car. Keep your keys out of reach and your car doors locked. We all know that little ones like to explore. Taking away access to the car eliminates the possibility of them crawling into the hot car and getting trapped.

Bystanders should know that Virginia has a “Good Samaritan” law to protect themselves from lawsuits for helping a person in an emergency. If you are a bystander and see a child alone in a hot vehicle, call 911 immediately and, if necessary, safely do what is needed to rescue the child.  It takes a village to raise a child, and we are counting on the entire community to keep them safe.

Additional Resources

Hot Cars and Child Safety

Look Before You Lock

BabyIn BabyOut

During this time of uncertainty, many of us have been given the opportunity to spend more time with our families. For some, this has been a time to reset, recharge, and reconnect. The extra time together is great and much needed. For others, it may be completely overwhelming. Between work, homeschooling, and managing the household, many parents are struggling to balance it all. We are in an unprecedented time, and it’s important to remember that no one has it figured out yet. As you navigate all of the changes and adjustments that are coming your way, be sure to make time to center yourself. Embrace your new normal by practicing and encouraging mindfulness.

Mindfulness allows us to have a close connection with our surroundings. Dr. David Anderson explains mindfulness as “Anything that helps everyone take a moment to slow down, stay present, and come together.” In other words, we are present and aware of where we are and what we’re doing. We’re not overly worried by hypothetical situations, but rather we are focused on our current situation. This gives us time to clear emotional clutter, gather our thoughts, release negative energy, and start each day fresh.

As parents of little ones know, children feed on and respond to shifts in our personalities and our emotional response to stressful situations. They understand when we’re upset, short-tempered, or stressed. In our best moments, we can find the space to breathe and consider healthy ways to respond in frustrating situations. However, as life becomes increasingly stressful and hectic, it can be easy to respond in ways that are unhealthy and impulsive. Practicing mindfulness can help increase the supportive and nurturing moments in our homes and decrease the likelihood of our emotions getting the best of us, causing additional stress.

When we’re mindful, we reduce stress, increase patience, enhance performance, and gain insight. This doesn’t mean a 2-week vacation to get away from reality, but intentionally incorporating simple practices into your daily routine to help you and your children stay grounded in the present. “Right now it’s very easy to let your brain spin out with the frightening possibilities,” warns Dr. Anderson. “Practicing mindfulness helps bring us back to the present, and away from the brink.”

Here are some mindfulness practices to try with your family:

• Take a family walk to block out all distractions. During the walk, encourage your children to stay focused on their surroundings. Have each person on the walk attempt to find an object to represent each color of the rainbow or take note of the different critters you encounter.
• Try a sitting meditation with the family. You could be seated on a chair or on the floor on a cushion. Keep your back straight, and relax. For your little ones, see who can be the quietest for 3 minutes.
• Take some time to stop, breathe, and think. This can help you and your family remain calm when times become stressful. During this activity, try counting and guiding your children through deep inhales and exhales.
• Create a mindful jar with your kids. It helps to represent those stressful emotions and you can focus on calming breathing techniques.
• Work on fun and mindful body poses like stretching and yoga to help you decompress. It’s great for kids, too!

Additional Resources

Mindfulness for Families and Children 

Practicing Mindfulness

Moments in Time that Build Awareness

6 Mindfulness Family Activities

Mindfulness for Kids and Teens

How Mindfulness can help during COVID-19

Children feel stress just like we do. They may experience stress from school, learning how to ride a bike by themselves, an upcoming performance, or traumatic events like natural disasters, being abused, neglected, or bullied. These events can overwhelm the child’s natural response to cope. Children may not recognize their anxiety and it may be hard to explain what they are feeling.  Signs of stress and anxiety in children often show up as changes in physical appearance or behavior. Remember, behavior has meaning and these changes just may be a signal for help.

Children who have experienced traumatic events need to feel safe. All parents want to provide a safe and loving home for their children. However, when parents do not have an understanding of the effects of trauma, they may see child as “acting out” and end up feeling frustrated themselves. By increasing your understanding of trauma, you can help support your child’s healing, your relationship with him or her, and your family as a whole. So how can you tell the difference between misbehavior and stress behavior?

What can trauma behavior look like?

This can be different for every child depending on age, developmental level, and the impact of the event. Your child may not react in the way you expect and others may not react until months later. Common reactions may include:

Withdrawal – such as loss of interest in activities, loss of confidence, and developmental regression

Preoccupation – needing to relive the experience, for example, through repetitive play or drawings, or nightmares

Anxiety – such as problems with concentrating or paying attention, attachment issues separation anxiety, sleep problems and irritable or self-destructive behaviors

Physical symptoms – such as headaches and stomach aches

How can I support my child during this time?

In the wake of a traumatic event, your comfort, support and reassurance can make children feel safe, help them manage their fears, guide them through their grief, and help them recover in a healthy way.

Here are some tips from the Children’s Bureau website:

• Identify trauma triggers
• Be physically and emotionally available
• Allow some control
• Listen
• Respond, don’t react
• Don’t take behavior personally. Your child isn’t “bad” or behaving this way on purpose.
• Read a book that may be similar to your child’s situation

When you are able to relax and discover the REAL source of your child’s behavior, it can create an immediate shift in how you think about, influence, and relate to your child. Your anger and frustration can turn into compassion, empathy, and confidence in an instant—and that’s what makes the difference.

Additional Resources:

How Trauma Affects Children in School

About Child Trauma

Signs of Trauma in Children

While February seems to be the month focused on relationships and love, we can continue to build and maintain these long-lasting connections everyday with our children. From Valentine’s Day in February to International Day of Families in May and National Loving Day in June, the year is filled with different opportunities to teach our children the importance of healthy relationships and the skills needed to build and nurture those relationships.

Relationships are an important part of a child’s social and emotional development. As humans, the need to communicate with others is essential. We create friendships, partnerships, and interactions that provide us the connection we need. Your child, whether you realize it or not, is learning and growing through their relationships with every person they’re in contact with. The skills needed to build healthy relationships begin to develop at birth.

As children get older, they become more independent and more focused on creating friendships with their peers. Although parents continue to be the most important people in their child’s life, children tend to distance themselves as they learn how to become self-sufficient. This is a good thing, but there are steps you can take to make sure that you’re maintaining a close, healthy relationship with your newly independent school-ager.

Growing and Maintaining a Relationship with Your School-Ager:

Keep it positive and intentional When you sense a perfect time to talk either about school or friends, be simple and positive. Your child is experiencing and learning a lot. Be careful not to shame them or make them feel uncomfortable talking to you. Let them know you are on their team!

Listen closely Sometimes as adults, it’s our instinct to impart our wisdom on our little ones. It’s important to remember that children learn the best by modeling or watching you. If your child wants to talk, listen closely, acknowledge their feelings, and empathize. This will go a long way in letting your child know you are a safe person to talk to.

Set clear rules Explain what you expect from your child upfront. Children like to know what to expect and what’s expected of them. Being clear about limits and expectations will help to reduce conflict and increase transparency in the household.

Have family meals Family meals can strengthen your family relationships and your child’s sense of belonging. It also provides time every day, free of distraction, to connect and have a conversation.

Create family traditions You may never realize the impact, memories, and connections that traditions can create. Whether it’s making cookies every Christmas Eve or going for ice cream before the first day of school each year, your children will love having a special family moment to look forward to and look back on.

Relationships require time, care, and a lot of nurturing. As parents, your energy is constantly being pulled in a thousand directions. Be sure to take a step back to ensure that the relationship with your school-ager is growing and developing just as they are.

Additional Resources:

Family Dinner Project

Relationships with school-age children: ideas and tips

The New Year is a time for fresh starts and resolutions. Many people use the New Year as a chance to set goals and intentions to improve different areas of their lives. From saving money, to exercising, to spending more time with loved ones- setting goals at the start of the year is a great practice.

As adults, our goals may be a bit more complex, but our children can benefit from goal-setting as well.Creating New Year’s resolutions with and for your children can help to set your child on the right path. By helping children establish healthy goals now, you encourage them to embrace healthy lifestyles as they grow into adults.

Make this the year you and your family lead

a healthier, more intentional lifestyle. 

At Home

Parents play a huge role in helping kids establish and maintain goals. Take some time as a family to come up with goals together. PBS for parents suggests that the best way to teach your children the importance of New Year’s resolutions is by making it part of the family tradition. Check out this template for a Family Goal Setting.

For younger children, this might mean assessing their current developmental milestones and determining where they need some attention. Maybe your toddler is walking like a pro but needs to add some words to their vocabulary. Make a plan, create action steps, and work for that goal! Your child will thank you for it later.

For older children, this might look like being more physically active or establishing better meal habits. You’re the parent and you know your child well, but don’t forget to let them weigh in. Ask them what they’d like to accomplish this year. Chances are they will be much more involved and excited about what they’re doing if they have a voice in the process.

In Child Care

Providers also play a role in helping establish and maintain goals. Because children in child care spend a majority of their waking hours with their providers, this is where a lot of growth can happen. Be sure to share your goals with your child care provider. Let them know what you’re working towards so that they can help. Children thrive the most when all of the caregivers in their lives are on the same page. This goes for goal-setting, as well!  

Accomplishing a goal feels great. Let’s share that feeling with our young ones.

Plan for a healthy and happy 2020!

Resources:

• Making New Year’s Resolutions with Your Child
• Encouraging Goal-Setting in Kids Ages 8-11